I used to see myself as a person with high self-esteme. But when it comes to love my self-esteme is zero i turn into a lap dog and take any shit that i get handed. I accepted to much on explainations even if i knew its was a lie. I would smile and accept the lie even if it tormented me inside made me insane jelous i would not say a word about it. I have always helped people not thinking about if they deserve it or not even if they threated me badly i would be there for them. I feel like i have been walking with a blindfold and like it was just taken off. All the lies and deceit have been shown to me resulting in a flood of burried emotions being unleashed. I'm trying to keep calm but the thoughts of some form of revenge on the people who backstabed me and missused my kindness are pulsating thru me everytime i hear their names mentioned. I want to pay them back for what they did and im afraid if im confronted with them i wont be able to restrain myself from blowing up and bringing them their well deserved payback. Confess ID: ry3kfp6f        Posted On: 26-Nov-2008