Theif1: Let Us Count D Money Dat V Have Robbed!
Theif2: I Am So Tired. We’ll See It In D Newspaper Tomorow .! - in Crazy Jokes
I Know U R Too Much Daring Person And Like To Dare To Any Game.
I Have A Special Dare 4 U.
Can You Do?
If Yes Then The Dare Is!
“Bijli K Transformer Par
Khadey Ho Kar Nahana Haiâ€. - in Crazy Jokes
Ek shadi mai dulhan ka pehla mangetar b saj dhaj k aya howa tha
Kisi ny pocha k kia ap dolha hain?
Us ny kaha
“Ge Nahe Main Semi Final Mai knock Out Hogaya Tha†- in Crazy Jokes
Tumhe Apni Girlfriend Ko
“i love uâ€
Bolna Hai,
Balance Khatam,
Ab Kya Karoge,
Kabutar Ke Gale Mein Bandh Ke chitthi Bhejoge,
Nahi Na,
Main Batata Hoon Kya Karna Hai,
apni Girlfriend Ka Number Mujhe De Do…..
Main “i lav u†Boldeta Hoon….. - in Crazy Jokes
Magistrate: Aakhir tum baar baar isi ek ghar se kyun pakray jatay ho?
Chor: Janab main in ka family chor hun… - in Crazy Jokes
A group of psychiatrists were attending a convention. Four of them decided to leave, and walked out together. One said to the other three, "People are always coming to us with their guilt and fears, but we have no one that we can go to when we have problems." The others agreed.
Then one said, "Since we are all professionals, why don't we take some time right now to hear each other out?"
The other three agreed.
The first then confessed, "I have an uncontrollable desire to kill my patients."
The second psychiatrist said, "I love expensive things and so I find ways to cheat my patients out of their money whenever I can so I can buy the things I want."
The third followed with, "I'm involved with selling drugs and often get my patients to sell them for me."
The fourth psychiatrist then confessed, "I know I'm not supposed to, but no matter how hard I try, I can't keep a secret..." - in Crazy Jokes
A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room. He found Patient #1 sitting on the floor, pretending to saw a piece of wood in half.
Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet.
The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was doing. The patient replied, "Can't you see I'm sawing this piece of wood in half?" The doctor inquired of Patient #1 what Patient #2 was doing. Patient #1 replied, "Oh. He's my friend, but he's a little crazy. He thinks he's a lightbulb." The doctor looks up and notices Patient #2's face is going all red.
The doctor asks Patient #1, "If he's your friend, you should get him down from there before he hurts himself"
Patient #1 replies, "What? And work in the dark?" - in Crazy Jokes
A man walked into a therapist's office looking very depressed. "Doc, you've got to help me. I can't go on like this."
"What's the problem?" the docotor inquired.
"Well, I'm 35 years old and I still have no luck with the ladies. No matter how hard I try, I just seem to scare them away."
"My friend, this is not a serious problem. You just need to work on your self-esteem. Each morning, I want you to get up and run to the bathroom mirror. Tell yourself that you are a good person, a fun person, and an attractive person. But say it with real conviction. Within a week you'll have women buzzing all around you."
The man seemed content with this advice and walked out of the office a bit excited. Three weeks later he returned with the same downtrodden expression on his face.
"Did my advice not work?" asked the doctor.
"It worked alright. For the past several weeks I've enjoyed some of the best moments in my life with the most fabulous looking women."
"So, what's your problem?"
"I don't have a problem," the man replied. "My wife does." - in Crazy Jokes
After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer's file and called him into his office.
"Mr. Haroldson, your records and your heroic behavior indicate that you're ready to go home. I'm only sorry that the man you saved later killed himself with a rope around the neck."
"Oh, he didn't kill himself," Mr. Haroldson replied. "I hung him up to dry." - in Crazy Jokes
A man was in his front yard mowing grass, when his attractive blonde female neighbor, Judy, came out of her house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box, and again opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, YOU'VE GOT MAIL." - in Crazy Jokes
One day a man went to a dealer to buy a car. He bought a chevy corvette crossfire for $29,000. When the man was getting back home he tried to start the radio. But it didn't worked. So he get back to the dealer and got busted for that. Then the dealer said the radio is auto tunned. Whatever channel u want just give the computer a clue and it will fix that for u. So the man tried it by sayin band. Radio went to a channel where james was singing. Then he switched it to adhunik. On the way a car suddenly cut him off frm the back. He said,"Stupid". The radio turned to another channel where J. W. Bush was giving his speech. - in Crazy Jokes